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The Music...Is It Destroying Me?


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#1
TasteOfColdBloodedInk

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well really...what ive noticed and what other people have told me (mostly friends and such) people are saying the music i listen to effects myself so much...I kinda know this myself because i will jsut be listen to a heavy song and start feeling real angry and lash at soemthing fro no reason at all...my friends say that this problem of mine isnt going anywhere and probably need to change my style of music..they say it triggers soemthing in my mind making me feel what the music is feeling reacting how it would react..people ask me so much why i listen to what they call "screaming" i just say listen real close and look deep into it the real words are there and ive been doing this for so long with my dad and brother gone my mother not caring about me i jsut listen music to take a edge off...my feelings could change in a sudden flash and it makes me want to hurt myself real bad sometimes listen to oter music just sitting there and wondering off into space thinking real deep like never before...and at night if im listen to something depressing and heavy i start to see like things move and get paranoid turning quickly behind me and thinking im hearign things and if i have the oppisite its like i see flashes of light out of the corner of my eye and feel like nothing like no one can harm me at all i really dont know what the hell is upw ith me at all anymore i cant trust anyone else to tell and can anyone jsut help me at all....

#2
[}D@rK{]Warrior

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i see what you mean, i notice my emotions tend not to be changed when i listen to music (except when it really sad, or i have a sudden understanding of what going on in that perosns life) i usually listen to music that suites my mood.
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#3
n_joy_n_sorrow

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Music should never make you feel worse. For me it's the exact opposite. When I'm pissed off I listen to something heavy and I feel better. Or I write something.
Nothing quite brings out the zest for life in a person like the thought of their impending death." -Nny
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#4
Vore

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Angry music gives me energy but it doesn't make me angry...The Spice Girls or Hanson made me angry...
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#5
sickfish

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yeah, those relaxation tapes get me all agitated. make me want to hit things, etc.

good punk and metal music make me want to get hammered and pass out.
i never found the rainbow's end, but at least i found a better place without you

#6
ohgr

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It sounds like to me that you have your plate full of problems right now TasteofColdBloodedInk.
So to blame the music you listen to entirely isn't the root of your anger and frustration. Lots of people suffer through it. I myself have had times where I would be listening to say ... Fear Factory, and felt hell bent on destroying my bed room (which I did at times when I was much younger).
But as time passes by, and you grow older and wiser, you eventually learn how to cope with your problems and frustrations.

Not to say that my problems are worse than yours, I grew up in a rural suburban area where it is mostly dominated by blacks and purto ricans. I am white, and was born with a birth defect called a cleft palette and cleft lip. I have a funky looking upperlip, weigh less than a 100 lbs, and I have a speec impediment.
I have had to deal with the ignorance of those who do not understand my "condition" for years, even to this day.
I have never felt like I belonged anywhere. I have never felt truely accepted.

But to say the least, I consider myself an out going and positive person, inspite of what I listen to and my birth defect. And it has taken me a long time to figure out that it doesn't matter what the hell the world thinks of me, it matters what I think, and what I want to do. Because none of those people pay my bills, put a roof over my head, or control my life.

What I would reccommend is to find some other of form to channel your anger and aggression. If music is making you want to hurt yourself, by all means change something about it before it goes too far. I like to write poetry, and play the guitar. That's my way of channeling out all the unwanted negative anger I can hold sometimes. Heh and if things are really shitty, I do like what Vore does... get hammered and passout.

Music can have a strange effect on you, I know. But you shouldn't let it control you to the point that you want to hurt yourself all the time. That's what you should think about. Just some friendly advice B)

#7
ohgr

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good punk and metal music make me want to get hammered and pass out.


Correction: Sickfish said that.. my bad heh ;)

#8
Akylore

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Gustav Mahler once said, "Music is not worth anything if first you have to explain to the listener what experience lies behind it." That is so true for me, someone once confronted why I listen to so much dark music and I replied, "This is what is REAL to me!!!" I see a lot of coldness and harshness in nature, be it physical, behavioural, etc.
My point is that music is a spiritual meduim that reflects our state and consciousness of being. In otherwards I do not believe that people smoke because a camel with sunglasses tell them to. I do not believe people tear up their cats in the name of Satan because Deicide told them to.
Your incentive to listen to music is probably a desire to fufill some void in your life, at least that's what it's always been for me...




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