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Just a few of my insane ramblings....
Posted 30 June 2005 - 12:10 AM
inspired in part by you...
thank for your words..
even though i'm absurd...
my wishes for greatness to you...
Posted 05 July 2005 - 10:05 AM
I would never laugh...this work is beautiful.
I can't write non-rhyming poetry...Please don't laugh...
"Cannibalia" - 5-13-05
Let me throw you on a guillotine
dismember your body I will,
Your blood will I drink like an ovaltine
so please witness me kill.
All the intestines will I cut
your lungs will I eat,
To work my way through your gut
to enjoy your sweet meat.
Your spine I shall crack
and consume your tandy ribs,
Through the muscles I wll hack
and laugh as your blood drips.
Crush your eyes I will
brains will I suck through the nose,
Your skull with wine will I fill
with cannibalistic violence I shall overdose.
Posted 05 July 2005 - 10:07 AM
Hi Hun!I would title this one Strings of Tortured Hope
Just another random work...
I hear a woeful violin weeping in the backdrop of my mind,
Bringing me forth to my own self mutilating rhetoricâ€¦
Such a beautiful tune it provides.
And the low tone of the violin plays softly and melodically in my mind,
Reminding me that I have love and empathy left to give,
In what is left of my feeble timeâ€¦
It was quite lovely.
Been a long time...
I like the title, how fitting it is.
Thank you for your compliment to my work...
Posted 05 July 2005 - 10:11 AM
How beautiful your words are...
i wrote something new...
inspired in part by you...
thank for your words..
even though i'm absurd...
my wishes for greatness to you...
I cannot imagine how I would inspire anything, but I am very honored, and cannot wait to read it.
Thank you for your sweet wishes...
I deeply appreciate them.
I wish you Peace and Happiness...
Posted 05 July 2005 - 10:16 AM
For those left behind, that is.
This is me... Mourning the loss of an Angel...
One that touched my life so,
that it will never be the same.
I fall asleep sitting in a yard of graves,
Gazing one upon the nextâ€¦
The wind whipping fire in the black blizzard that has become my hair
Exposing my tender flesh to the blazing thorns of pain
Looking down to find no one hereâ€¦
Searching the sky,
As if to see something thereâ€¦
But only the stars of a million deaths and miseries...
Yet in my prison of fleshy existence,
I find only one.
And then I find two.
Nothing is true of wounded soulsâ€¦
Even those who live in denial of such sensory value,
Could never express that deep sense of dread,
As I attempt here and now
With the searing voices in the back of my head,
Calling for deathâ€¦
Beseeching my voice, my objection
Yet no choice is ever mine you see,
And guilt eats my insides alive
Similar to a flesh-eating bacteria,
Only it devours me from within.
Itâ€™s mutilating my flesh and raping my mind.
Itâ€™s a dark cloud of desertion and regrets
Always hovering above my head
Standing around me
Enhancing my already tweaked,
And all-encompassing dread
And blood in my eyesâ€¦
The core of my being rocked to regression
Locked in a wayward soul,
Full of love and devotion.
Yet void in the trust and remembrance to have such loveâ€¦
As the memories fade and illusions fall away,
I awake only to realize
Iâ€™m forced to face this,
And a droplet of blood falls from my eye,
Causing tendrils of the black tresses,
Barely attended to
To matte in the face of such heartache,
And the torturous thoughtsâ€¦
The perfectly horrible screaming
Pure innocence is lostâ€¦
Causing such pain and confusion,
I can only look up,
And with the wind whipping fire in the blizzard of my hair,
I allow the sweet, bloody rain
To wash me away again,
Leaving behind me,
My deepest, most heartfelt desireâ€¦
Posted 25 July 2005 - 07:51 PM
To look into the eye of strangeness,
Is to look into the eyes of meâ€¦
Only in learning to cultivate my own wildness,
Will I ever be able to rationalize my own cognitive and relative realityâ€¦
Indulging in a happier, more peaceful existence,
But perhaps a bit more oddâ€¦
Coinciding without a voice,
Originality is but only another choiceâ€¦
Demanding a defiance to accept emotional assassination,
An assertion of positive stature and position
Desiring the actual tool of ones obsessionâ€¦
Yet maybe only to desire,
Or in the thwarting of suchâ€¦
Revolting against rejection,
I can barely come to myselfâ€¦
Only imploring a love whose passion remains,
A midnight conclusion,
Caused by the force of an illusionâ€¦
Living and dying,
In a perpetual motionâ€¦
Deviation from the norm inherent,
In uniform conformityâ€¦
(If such a thing exists)
Vexing and unrelenting in this my issueâ€¦
Is it not possible to contemplate,
When consumed by a verifiable confusion?
I wish to just discover,
What it is, that constitutes my normalityâ€¦
Or what it is not.
What is it, I ask, that makes me, me?
Lost in a world of theoretical psychology,
Faltering in the science that demands a certain standard of objectivityâ€¦
Cutting me from your sacred cloth
Bizarre habits thrive in a fundamentalist society,
Or maybe just in my headâ€¦
But leave me alone,
My palette of thornsâ€¦
My imagination is piqued,
As I rest in a deep sleep,
Yet I am a mystical hermitâ€¦
The object of my love,
Not entirely encompassedâ€¦
For I am repelled and threatened,
By what society deems eccentricâ€¦
Posted 13 August 2005 - 06:52 PM
I can see in the distance,
Patches of lightâ€¦
Encased in the illumination,
Of the fireflies dance, on this brisk autumns eveâ€¦
Weaving and winding,
Disguising my perceptionâ€¦
I wonder if they dread the inevitable?
The silence unbroken,
In the death of the nightâ€¦
They never had a chance,
My lovely fireflies in flightâ€¦
Perhaps tangibility lies in the darkness,
The swirling and glowing, mysterious mythsâ€¦
Led by inexplicable forces,
Itâ€™s entertainment en masseâ€¦
Yet I regressâ€¦
To speak of the virtual fortress that warps in my mind,
That was my intention,
My original designâ€¦
Not only to deter and negate the one who washes his hands in my blood,
But anyone else who comes into sight,
Anyone who attempts to breach these wallsâ€¦
To endeavor would be fruitless,
As I have built a strong resistanceâ€¦
And a perimeter,
The fireflies still dance in the distanceâ€¦
They are playing with time,
For time can never be erasedâ€¦
And it, like love,
Cannot be measured by distance or spaceâ€¦
Ah, the musical sound of the midnight hour,
A sparkling reflection from my very existenceâ€¦
Falling around me in an ostentatious appearance
I am the neglected,
The tired and the wornâ€¦
I constantly search for a place to call home.
I am overly occupied by goals and promises,
As the splinters of reality embed themselves in my palmsâ€¦
Remaining in the realm of infinity,
Pressing it so cruelly against my chestâ€¦
The cryptic curse that has caused me to weep at your feet,
Leave it with me,
Allow me to writhe,
In my own bitter defeatâ€¦
And in the death of the night I will silently waitâ€¦
With shame cascading in waves of regret,
And the shards of glass, slicing at my tender fleshâ€¦
I focus on the fearless fireflies again,
As they dance the dance of deathâ€¦
Beneath the waning moon,
In the light of a fading mistâ€¦
I find myself dying in a rush of bloody fragments,
Fragments of me and my soulâ€¦
Exposing the light of my brilliant fire,
That brings me to my final truthâ€¦
While closing any door that may lead to desire,
Iâ€™m showing myself,
To no one but youâ€¦
Posted 06 September 2005 - 04:37 PM
you paint a picture that dances and shimmers as though burning...the actual subject of the painting changing with each shift...transcendance...an i can't help but wonder about the things that inspire your work...it gives me a sort of metaphoric insight into your life and the workings of your emotions and psyche...a sort of intellectual intimacy that is rarely experienced...i've been so busy lately and have had very little time to sketch, write, or formulate poetry...it's scary how disconnected i've become from my creative processes, altogether unsettling....please continue your beautifull works...
Posted 16 May 2006 - 08:18 AM
As the pure agony of her ironic defeat purges,
It binds her intolerance, unearthing her defenses…
See her eye, as it catches the black liquid mass,
That is careening down this mountain…
At long last, a steely mass to engulf her tired body
Allowing the shards of time to release her agony…
Frozen in time is the reaction of her fate,
Her final moment of destiny…
The trueness of her person, her indignant remedies…
Not really a person, nor even a place
Just another mirror shattered,
A moment in time massacred…
A feeling of intention, yet one so illusive
Something surrounding the mind with a disdainful grace,
Oxymoron in terms, yet beautifully true…
If one begs to differ, just look to her face
For there in her eyes lies a grace once alluded,
As she finds herself both shocked and completely lucid…
This lake of impending doom exposes a wound that was once healed,
A wound that is begging, pleading to be heard…
A panic! A passion!
A fruitless illusion…
Such that is stealing her utterly disdainful emotion,
This mass comes in waves of fluid, debilitating motions
It’s a shower of reeling metamorphisms, lapsing over time
Trapped in this, the emotions that steal and bind…
And in tasting the womb of her own divinity,
Wrapped in a tunnel of writhing insanity
She succumbs to every fear she has ever know
As each realizes its own final, deafening silence…
Posted 11 July 2006 - 01:48 PM
Posted 28 July 2006 - 12:03 AM
Seems you remind me of someone too.
The_Vanished, let us cement our knowledge and see if we are right.
Who is it that my work reminds you of?
Could it be a woman- ravenous- in her persuit?
Or no, sweet Julian...
Edited by Weeping_Angel, 28 July 2006 - 12:07 AM.
Posted 20 November 2006 - 11:26 PM
Her sun kissed skin draped in radiant robes
She relaxes on this her threshold
Giving her life through the tips of her fingers
Fingerprints in the sands of life
Touching the moist dew on the petal of love
"Wash me clean", she says...
As he tends to her gushing soul
"Time does not heal all wounds", he reminds
He licks the bloody teardrops that flow from her minds eye
Within her mind lies a window,
A window all her own...
A window she shares with only one...
Acceptance and Insight cannot quench the pain of such
Seems only the chains of remorse hold him away
Flesh never touched...
Her golden crown glitters in the night
As she find her king to hold
But his arms are too strong, his grasp so quick
Within him she will surely drown
Loves purest beauty, and it's deepest pain
When the dewdrops kiss her face in this,
Her garden elapsed by humanities divide
The trees of times demise...
It is his fingertips that trace her lips
Tendrils fall about her face, his hands and her desire
Lovers kiss that lasts through time
Orchids come to bloom around them
A heart that follows the night, lead by one that only sees light
Let remorse know no name of ours
This queen follows her brave hearted soul,
Rest easy she begs, honest in her trust
Let her wings not burn as they near the sun
She flies with him in his powerful grasp
As long as he can hold her...
As long as she is possibly able
If her wings ever fail, let her fall swiftly into him
Don't throw her body by the sea
Seek her out if it is, that he wants she
Her weakness is in and undivided
Yet united by love
The mourning coo of a lonely dove..
She watches her fingers race across lines,
As they trace only his name...
She lays her soul across the Dragons chest
Finding comfort in his embrace
His wings hold her tight,
Yet always allow her to fly away...
He uses his magic to light the night,
In which they soar
Seeking out her savage garden,
He gently sets her down...
He sets her down, yet he never lets her go
He leads her to a palace he created just for her
Watching her as she revels in the majesty of his vision
She wanders a spectacular path he has laid before her
It's as if Heaven itself has silently beckoned
And called her glory to his outstretched hand...
He stands with her under that stars
Taking in her every movement...
An orchestra waits to begin at his cue
And does so when she bows her head in acceptance
They dance, they kiss
He shows her who they really are
Violet sentiments of a love so lasting
So very true,
Traces lay everywhere as the faces begin to blur
He goes to one knee as she walks to him...
Raw and exposed... ready to love again.
Arm at her sides with not an intention
Though to simply stand naked
And bask in His glorious reflection...
Posted 24 November 2006 - 12:09 AM
Posted 28 December 2006 - 03:21 PM
You flatter me Julain, for the way you write is so beautiful and inspiring to me that I cannot imagine you finding anything in my work that would not have alraedy been touched by yours.
I have had faith in you from the beginning. As your talent is so astounding...your heart so pure and full of emotion. I see in your soul something that always brings me to where you are, so that I can absorb what you scribe.
I would see us talking into the night, if the oceans would allow, for I feel that our paths are leading us on the same venture. We do have much in common and a love for life and beauty that extends its hand accross the miles that span...
Thank you for your words sweetness...they tug at my heart~
Posted 28 December 2006 - 03:25 PM
'I am but emotions bound in pen and feelings are like chains, as I bind my spirit to this, the empty page...'
So consuming is the fortress of solitude,
Lingering desires that suck the soul writhing in silence,
Keep the falling that hold fast to the bound...
Shades of Grey conceal the one who licks the dripping wounds,
Amazing are the lofty ambitions of a sleeping mind...
Bits and pieces shred around her aimless goals...her intentions,
Suffering so complete and wrenching to the soul who holds the Golden Orchid...
A tear escapes her eye as she climbs the stairs to her bedchamber,
Falling into the cold and callous sheets that betray her warmth,
Oh, how sobering the tug of remorse...
Longing for that single Kiss...
Everyone needs something beautiful to fill the hole inside of them...
It is the breath of fire that she sees in her minds eye,
That which keeps her spirit alive...
And she will remain forever if only to indulge in this...
Poised and ready to attack without merit,
So easy to push love from the heart of consciousness...
So delicate are the grains of sand,
That slip through the fingers of Father Times hand...
To see her suffer is to leave her in solitude,
Such is a pain too sweet to taste...
The bitterness that swims behind her haunting eyes....
Blinding her the truth that bleeds into the night,
Pain is better than no feeling at all...
Peering out the window of her enchanted fortress,
Only to find no one looking back at her...
Dreams of love knock on her dusty door,
But no answer comes to those who call...
Sinful are the yens of her heart, time is lost and undivided,
She reads the amber eyes to ease her pain...
Ride her dreams and kiss her tears... as she chokes on them
Remembering together, knowing alone
Leave her her heated breath for fear there is naught...
Acceptance, sickeningly inherent...
Broken and bleeding is the heart that sobs for completion
Never knowing the words that need to be said
And the tainted innocence that dies,
Masking the irrational elation,
When reality takes denials place on the Throne of realisms destination...
Posted 30 December 2006 - 08:58 AM
and you shouldn't take for granted your gift, if all poetry had the same beat and flow it would make for a much more boring existence.
if you could only see yourself the way others see you.
Posted 30 December 2006 - 09:26 PM
But then would my gift be different if I did?...
Would I? Be different that is.
One never knows, and the view from the outside is almost always clearer than the one from the inside..That said/typed,
I see through a window..If that makes any sense at all. Everything is blurred by the dew that collects on the glass...
I confuse myself somtimes.
Needless to say, I thank you kindly for your words of praise, and for your time in reading my humble work...
Posted 06 May 2009 - 06:43 AM
Suck this venom from me!
To halt the infusion of misery...
Don't let it touch my core,
I'm only living in my now...
Laughing or crying
Some people never let go
Yet others can go on...
Tight that silent thread
And step outside yourself
If only to face my screams...
Baking powder dreams...
Is just getting by really living?
Where has integrity gone?
Dripping with teeth ...
Making me bleed...
Never been defined by anyone ...but me...
Nightmarish dreams set to shape
The ache in blinding smiles...
Freedom looking better every moment
Watch me break the walls
And never give in...
Step free from what it is that binds me...
Facilitate my own needs?
The flashes of conscious
Leave the heart to mend
Silent the noise of deeds?
A path needs extension
From one never left...
Evicting notions of love or grandeur
Contentment embracing the flesh of one
The heart of another...
Beautiful secrets stored too deep,
To have any other find them...
Hold me close while you twist that knife,
A legacy to comprehend...
As I enhance my inner colors,
Plastic birdhouses become invasive...
A mirror with two faces
A candle without a wick
Another broken memory...
Ah, my throne of self-indulgence...
The perpetual martyr without a cause,
Skin peeled back to reveal the beast...
But to erase oneself and start anew!
To feel the pen scribe,
Than ultimately destroy...
A lesson in self preservation
Or complete defeat?
Ponder a moment
As I fall in...behind you...
Yet reaching out for nothing...
Eyes once bright and full of light
Dimmed to a haunting Grey
Where I see, not how,
A glimmer could come back to them...
Eyes forced by betrayal
To look away...
Unable to have faith
In ultimate destiny...
The pedal from an orchid
Floating in a pool of blood...
Every aspect of a life known well
Stripped and dead,
Sleeping under a willow tree...
Secret agendas and systematic lies
Regret in the finality of one test...
The evolution of internalization
Gnawing at my feet...
Bringing the core of a burning flame
Pleasure vs. Pain...
How much can one lowly soul take?
Sorrow directs a path...
Lost in reaching for nothing,
Only to find true colors...
Fly away little birdie
Empty bottles, shattered glass
A face ravaged by lies
Broken wings stalk the night...
Solemn is said fight
To have one glimpse of light
Behind a vacant stare...
Those words and wounds
Dark secrets drift in a black memory...
Yet shadowy vines reach still,
To kiss the Moon...
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